(Everyone TRUDGES to MORDOR. Except for Merry, who doesn't. Their TRIP is oddly QUIET and the army is FREAKED OUT. Aragorn uses emotional BLACKMAIL to persuade them to continue. Then they reach the Black Gate of Mordor.)

Aragorn: "Oi, Sauron, come out and fight, if you think you're hard enough!"

Mouth of Sauron: "Thanks for the two rodents you sent us. Give up or we'll torture them for eternity!"

Gandalf: "Take a hike."

(The Gate OPENS and the HOSTS of MORDOR surround them. The sun goes down, the NAZGÛL show up and the gang know they are going to lose SPECTACULARLY. Beregond is KNOCKED down by a troll-chief who Pippin STABS. Pippin is about to FAINT after nearly being SQUASHED by the troll-chief when he hears people SHOUTING something about Eagles. He FAINTS.)
<< Previous << | >> Next >>

Tags: trudging, Mordor, freaked out, black rider, spectacular, stabbed, fainting

(They ESCAPE Cirith Ungol, OBSESS about water and Frodo notices the RING is very, very, very HEAVY. They figure out that the War isn't going so well for Sauron, but are WORRIED when they see a HUGE army of Orcs and Men in the DISTANCE.)

Sam: "We're screwed."

Frodo: "Whatever."

(They listen to an ARGUMENT between two orcs and LEARN the Gollum is HANGING around. They TRUDGE along, get MISTAKEN for orcs and are forced to MARCH to Udûn. It's all looking pretty GRIM for the Hobbits but LOTS of Orc companies RUN into each other and so they ESCAPE in the CONFUSION. Frodo FAINTS.)
<< Previous << | >> Next >>

Tags: escape, obsession, ring, worried, argument, learning, trudging, confusion, fainting

(Frodo TELLS Faramir he's not hiding anything, but Faramir doesn't BELIEVE him and asks QUESTIONS about why he's hanging around Mordor. Drawing on past EXPERIENCE, Frodo refuses to give Faramir a STRAIGHT ANSWER. Instead, he TALKS about Aragorn and his SWORD and everyone is IMPRESSED. Except for Faramir, who isn't. Eventually, Frodo TELLS him a strategically ABRIDGED version of events and LEARNS that Boromir and Faramir were brothers. Then they TRUDGE to some CAVES for DINNER.)

* * *

(After DINNER and a quick LESSON in TABLE MANNERS, Frodo TELLS Faramir about his Boromir's part in the Company.)

Frodo: "Yeah, Boromir was a great bloke - liked a good skirmish."

Faramir: "Indeed! He was the most valiant of our people. There was no-one braver or more honourable."

Sam: "Yup. Except for that time when he tried to steal the One Ring from Frodo."

Frodo: "Sam, you're a prat."

Faramir: "The One Ring! Well, what a piece of luck! Never fear, though, I'm not much into the Dark Lord's jewellery - I don't want it. What are you going to do with it?"

Frodo: "Melt it."

(Frodo FAINTS, Faramir TUCKS him into BED and Sam SAYS that Faramir REMINDS him of a WIZARD [don't ask].)

<< Previous << | >> Next >>

Tags: straight answer, impressed, sword, learning, trudging, eating, ring, prat, fainting, bed

Frodo: "What the hell happened?"

(Everyone is UNABLE to give Frodo a STRAIGHT ANSWER. Next day Strider finds the BLACK RIDER'S knife and the BLADE disappears in a PUFF of SMOKE [don't ask].)

Strider: "Oooh, that's not good."

* * *

(They TRUDGE towards Rivendell, Frodo has lots of NIGHTMARES and Sam WHINES.)

* * *

Pippin: "Arrgh! Trolls!"

Strider: "Idiot:

• Family history;
• Broad daylight;
• Made of stone;
• Bird's nest behind ear."

(Sam SINGS and they TRUDGE on.)

* * *

Strider: "Glorfindel!"

(They put Frodo on Glorfindel's horse and get AMBUSHED by the BLACK RIDERS. Glorfindel's horse ESCAPES and the BLACK RIDERS are WASHED away by the RIVER. Frodo FAINTS.)

<< Previous << | >> Next >>

Tags: unable, straight answer, black rider, blade, puff, smoke, don't ask, trudging, nightmares, whining, singing, ambushed, escape, washed, river, fainting

(The BLACK RIDERS attack the WRONG room. Then the gang LEAVE Bree. Sam recites POETRY and Strider BERATES them for mentioning MORDOR. A lot.)

* * *

Strider: "Snazzy, Weathertop!"

Merry: "This place is dingy."

* * *

Strider: "Arrgh! The Enemy! Let's light a fire."

Sam: "Won't that give us away?"

(Everyone IGNORES him. Strider tells a very long STORY about an Elf-woman.)

* * *

Merry: "Eek! Shapes!"

(The BLACK RIDERS attack, Frodo puts the RING on and gets STABBED. Strider CHASES them off with FIRE. Frodo FAINTS.)

<< Previous << | >> Next >>

Tags: black rider, wrong, leaving, poetry, berate, Mordor, ignoring, story, ring, stabbed, chasing, fire, fainting